Life as it shouldn't be seen

You used to live your life dreaming to see
And you lived only to finally be
The one who gives in to human vitality
To spread your ideals of love and empathy
How ironic it was then that you were destined to see
That it meant nothing really in the end
And I know

I know the sun was your light and the dark was your night
But the sun was taken from you
I know that peace was your friend, it provided no end
Cause it was endlessly trapped in a dream
And now you cannot see, life as it shouldn't be

Facing the sun waiting for the ocean to come
To wash your wretched sins away
Life can be to much for a human to face
While knowing he may not be alive at all
I mean just face the irony of your own existance
You're both a god and nothing at all
The world is your friend til it makes you descend
To an animal which death has yet to claim
So trust me now I know

I know the sun was your light and the dark was your night
But the sun was taken from you
I know that peace was your friend, it provided no end
Cause it was endlessly trapped in a dream
And now you cannot see, life as it shouldn't be seen

Truth and Illusion

More and more, I found truth to be nothing more than an illusion.
It always is isn't it?, even to those who feel they've found truth,
isn't it only an illusion that originates in them comfusing truth with a feeling?
One could speculate that if there is such a thing as truth it is no more
than a simple human feeling that originates from the biological bodies that we inhabit.
Or, one could speculate that if there is a truth it will always be out of reach for being such as
humans that live in total inperfection and illusion.
But I can't determine though, which is more sad, ignorant bliss or intelligent despair.
I feel trapped in both states. So, is that the conclusion?
That the truth is that there is no truth?
I don't really like that.

Existentialism

The prospect of finding relative peace at the hands of existentialism opens up a whole new world to me,
I no longer have to find a higher purpose being sent by the messiah of great spirits.
I could find my solution within linear time, within one self and the experiences that has yet to come.
The sort of personality that I possess can best be described as a dreamer,
as a person with an open mind and his head in the clouds.
But it also means a very unstable psychological state as well as the
burden of being attracted to sad things and a neverending longing for purpose.

Faith

"What is the most basic article of faith? 'This is not all that we are.'
See, the difference between you and me is, I know what that means and you don't.
I know that I'm more than this body, more than this consciousness.
A part of me swims in the stream, but in truth, I'm standing on the shore.
The current never takes me downstream." -Leoben Conoy

Meaning

More and more, revelations are approaching my conscious mind closer and closer.
I feel the ache of a arduous truth in my head.

Our meaning as hybrids of animals and godlike creatures is a twisted one,
We have tried to justify our purpose as long as we have existed as a race,
Most people believe being a good person equals to believing in happiness as the meaning of life.
But I have come to a different conclusion.

As people we strive to know ourselves, and therefore assume that our meaning and our purpose originate inside us.
But how do you define meaning?
I do not believe in a god blindly, but I believe the question itself has an ulterior motive,
the question implies that we are here on this Earth because of something,
because someone created us, that we have a purpose given to us by someone else.

And what separates us from the animals, is conscious thought. What separates us from the machines
(the hypothetical self aware ones in the future) is the biological aspect of our being which makes us imperfect but also unique.

But this can also be a blessing, as it also opens up our experience to a totally different reality,
and that I believe is our purpose. To think with a truly unique perspective of things.
With the gift of irrational thought we can learn to see beyond ourselves and into a universe of possibilities.

But if I am to be introvert for a second, and analyze myself, I know that I have grown to be a bit
sociophobic, anti-humanist and maybe even a closeted psycho.

But what keeps me from being a bad person is my own personal belief in souls.
Even though I believe that a single human life has far less worth than most believe it does,
I do believe compassion and kindness are fundamentally important to us.
This mostly because I think that if our souls leave
this world as hateful and evil beings unable to be at peace, it can only mean bad things for oneself in
the afterlife, if such a thing exists.

That’s why I believe happiness and being at peace is something we should strive for, even though
we shouldn’t fool ourselves by calling it the meaning of life. I know many people avoid philosophy
because they find it tiresome, and a heavy burden to live with once you get deep into it. This I know,
knowing too much can often be a burden, but I do not want to feel the sensation of meaninglessness
that I would feel leading a life without thinking of why I am really here.

But that’s just me.

Beginning

So this is my first post, I'm not really sure what you're going to find here in the future,
I might say something that matters or something that has no meaning.
I might post some of my music or write something of importance to me.
We'll see.